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Okay, it's an oldie, but still makes me laugh:
There once was a woman who had wanted a parrot more than anything for her whole life, but she could never afford to buy one. Then came a day when the woman, elderly now, learned that a friend who had recently passed had left the woman his beautiful pet parrot. Well, the woman was overjoyed and immediately bought a new cage, the very latest parrot toys, and the best seed available. When she brought the parrot home, she was shocked and mystified to learn the parrot seemed to hate her! The parrot cussed her out whenever it saw her and would bite and claw her every time she opened the cage to clean it or feed the ungrateful bird. Now, this woman was a gentle person who wouldn't hurt a fly, but after a month or so of this treatment, she had reached her limit. As the parrot went to bite her again, she snapped and snatched the squawking bird by the throat, stormed to the kitchen, slammed the freezer open, threw the bird in and slammed the door shut. As she turned away, the parrot's cussing could be heard through the door, but the gentle woman was already regreting her actions. As she approached the freezer, she noticed that the bird had suddenly become very quiet..."Good Lord, I've killed it!" She threw open the door and the parrot flew out and landed on her arm and proceeded to offer her the most sincere apologies for his abusive behaviors. After flattering and grovelling to the old woman, the parrot said, "Is it alright to ask you just one question now that you have forgiven me?" "Of course" she replied. The parrot said "I just want to know what the chicken did!"
There once was a woman who had wanted a parrot more than anything for her whole life, but she could never afford to buy one. Then came a day when the woman, elderly now, learned that a friend who had recently passed had left the woman his beautiful pet parrot. Well, the woman was overjoyed and immediately bought a new cage, the very latest parrot toys, and the best seed available. When she brought the parrot home, she was shocked and mystified to learn the parrot seemed to hate her! The parrot cussed her out whenever it saw her and would bite and claw her every time she opened the cage to clean it or feed the ungrateful bird. Now, this woman was a gentle person who wouldn't hurt a fly, but after a month or so of this treatment, she had reached her limit. As the parrot went to bite her again, she snapped and snatched the squawking bird by the throat, stormed to the kitchen, slammed the freezer open, threw the bird in and slammed the door shut. As she turned away, the parrot's cussing could be heard through the door, but the gentle woman was already regreting her actions. As she approached the freezer, she noticed that the bird had suddenly become very quiet..."Good Lord, I've killed it!" She threw open the door and the parrot flew out and landed on her arm and proceeded to offer her the most sincere apologies for his abusive behaviors. After flattering and grovelling to the old woman, the parrot said, "Is it alright to ask you just one question now that you have forgiven me?" "Of course" she replied. The parrot said "I just want to know what the chicken did!"
